I recently realised my wardrobe is full of dark colours. Mostly black. For some people that is fine, but for me it feels too harsh. It’s a colour I’ve used to “slim” and fade into the background and meh to that. Deep down I’m a colourful person and so I… well…

I do enjoy “hauls”. It’s always fun to see the bits and pieces that people love. Not only that, but it kinda showcases a little of themselves, too, to see the things that people choose to spend their money on. With that in mind, I thought it’d be fun to photograph basically my unpackaging and let you into the fun. I’ve never talked about how I choose to present myself to the world in this way before on the blog, so it’s new territory that I figure a few of you will likely enjoy.

Oh. My. Glob.

The first item – and no, I am not showing this stuff one by one, don’t worry – is this beautiful pair of glitzy shoesies from Evans!

They are a lovely pair of flat-heeled wide-fit pumps which honestly caught my eye because I thought they would look wonderful with the bag I also bought, and they do! Actually, these shoes blew me away. I’ve never bought shoes from Evans before and the subtle cushioning in the soles makes me oh-so-happy. I have a lot of trouble with shoes because of my stupid oversized feet (I called them spatula feet, they’re not even fat so I’m stuck with them alas) so any cushioning is ever so welcome. I need wide-fit, flat shoes (I also have barely-there arches, and my feet bleed at the mere appearance of a flip-flop), and these fit nice and snug. Plus they’re glittery and have those cute little bows, so these will work for everyday or dressing up. Perfect!

The next little parcel was from Dorothy Perkins, who I didn’t realise had started a plus sized line. I didn’t end up buying clothes from them however, but I need fun, colourful accessories just as much in my wardrobe. Here we’ve got some of those weird socks intended for wear with.. well pumps, I guess. That’s my intention anyway. Sometimes it’s cold, or your feet get sweaty, but you definitely don’t wanna go all socks-and-sandals, so I picked up a pack of two pairs, and then the kitties and kissing llamas because I have a thing for fun patterned socks. I have a huge collection of animal-themed socks by now and bizarrely, no kitties. So I fixed it. Sunglasses because.. I don’t have any. Well, I lie, I have an old pair of prescription sunglasses but I hate how they look and my prescription’s changed so if I’d rather wear sunglasses that don’t give me a headache until I get my eyes tested again, and these are really pretty. Then a kinda dusky pink belt I intend to wear as a waist belt – I like to add a little flair when wearing dresses sometimes. And a light, colourful butterfly snood. This is actually my first snood and I love it! I’m getting a pretty decent collection of scarves now, too. I think I’d like to have a nice rainbow of scarves so I have something for every outfit.

Err… sorry about the flash on this one. It’s the best picture I took at the time.

This is the big New Look package. This is the aforementioned bag. It looks more purple here but it’s actually black with multicoloured glitter which shimmers between purple, pink, orange, gold, green and blue depending on the lighting and how you look at it, I looove it. I have a tendency to buy a bag and just use that bag exclusively until I get bored with it 2 or 3 years later and currently it’s just a black cross-body bag with some purple flairs which I’m trying to decorate with pins. But I thought it might be fun to mix things up with a cute mini-backpack sometimes. If it clicks, maybe I might pick up a few other bags down the line to mix things up a bit more. If not, also cool. Also got a cat-ear headband because I’m… me, some little bow hair clips, a couple of vest tops, a kimono(?), hanky hem dress, and a khaki jacket.

Camera flash gives me demon eyes every time without fail.

So I made Dan take pictures. I hate them but I’m trying to be better at self-confidence and really, who gives a shit? We all look how we look. Anyway, this post isn’t about that! Here I am wearing one of the vest tops and the kimono(?), both of which I’m sadly returning. I found the vest top a nice fit around my waist but a little baggy around my bust which kinda sucks, I find it looks a bit sloppy so I’m returning the two vest tops I got. I have a white one from Yours already which is a pretty perfect fit. And I love the kimono/blouse thing however, though you can’t see it very well, the top button is missing, and there’s not even a spare with it so I can’t fix it myself. Otherwise I love how flattering it is. I may try to get a replacement, but no promises.

Here is the dress. I love the hanky hem and err… so funny story. The flappy bits of fabric below my arms are actually sleeves. I realised and made Dan take additional pictures but I extra hate those pictures, which I will still show you and explain at the end, so you can see the sleeves there. Here though, I love the lightness of this dress. It feels like the perfect summer dress. My only issues with it are that it is minorly see-through, so gotta choose what I wear underneath it very carefully, and well… I feel like it’s somewhat unflattering, but that could be my self-esteem talking. From the front, it is lovely. From the side, I’m unsure.

Me being dorky in the jacket and sunglasses. I like them both a lot. The sunglasses, I feel, suit me nicely, but they’re also pretty with the cat eye detail, so that’s fun. And the jacket is good. I’m not really sure what else to say about that. It’s more casual (no I wouldn’t usually wear it with this dress) and has a good weight to it. I think it’ll be perfect for the cooler nights in autumn and I’m thinking I might add a patch or something to it.

Kitty. MySpace, anyone?

Alright, and the Yours package contains a long dreamcatcher necklace, which I’m actually in love with. I don’t have much jewellery, just one or two staples, so it’s nice to add some more flavour to the accessory pile. Then I picked up a pair of support pants (knickers, which are going back as they don’t fit quite right), a waterfall jersey cardigan in a kind of grey-purple colour – I love these things. They’re a really light, airy fabric, the waterfall design is flattering, and they cover my arms which are scarred to heck because of my dermatillomania. I currently have a black one and a royal blue one, which I’m not convinced is a good colour on me, so the more the better. I also picked up a plain yellow v-neck T-shirt just to add a little yellow to my wardrive, and two pairs of cropped leggings in magenta-pink and that kind of jade-green colour. £8 each, guys. And they’re comfy as heck. Also on top of the yellow, I think I’m all set for my children’s TV presenter cosplay, whaddya think?

Alright so… this picture. I wasn’t going to use it, but looking at it upset me. Maybe it’s an unflattering angle, maybe I am as large as I look, but you know what? I decided to share it BECAUSE it upset me so much. Because yeah, I’m fat. That’s just something I have to deal with for now because that doesn’t go away overnight, but it also doesn’t make me any less of a person and if I continue trying to hide from the fact, my mental health will never get better. And yes, my hair gets frizzy, and my arms look diseased from years and years of compulsive picking, but these are all parts of me and it’s okay. I am still me and I may as well have fun with how I dress myself, right?! I love wardrobe systems in MMOs so much, it’s perhaps more valuable for me to come up with outfits for myself rather than just sticking on a random black dress and boots on and calling it good enough. Besides, when I see pictures of other people of my size like these, my immediate reaction is “YAASS YOU LOOK AMAZING!” I should not have a different rule for myself.

So that’s that. There are a couple more items on the way, but this was the main haul and I’m happy to add a little more zest to my wardrobe in whatever form that comes. Mostly rainbows and sparkle. Next, I want to look into picking up some cruelty free makeup. I’m not a big makeup wearer. I don’t get out much because anxiety and tourists are fun so it feels somewhat pointless to spend more than an hour on something that isn’t really going to be seen. I’ve been getting dressed a lot more lately, so I have that going for me, but makeup is most fun when the effort gets some airtime, right? Either way, I’d like to look into it, add some colour, some shimmer, some pretty, and also look into doing something with the purple hair dye I bought last year. I’m not sure I wanna go full-purple so any ideas and advice on that front are very welcome! I have bleach (or lightening, I dunno, I’m a dark blonde anyway which helps) and a mixing bowl + brushes, so it’s just working out what I wanna do with it.

Either way, I’d like to look into it, add some colour, some shimmer, some pretty, and also look into doing something with the purple hair dye I bought last year. I’m not sure I wanna go full-purple so any ideas and advice on that front are very welcome! I have bleach (or lightening, I dunno, I’m a dark blonde anyway which helps) and a mixing bowl + brushes, so it’s just working out what I wanna do with it.

This was lots of fun to put together. I spent too much, I have only minor regrets, but at least I’m sending things back. Tell me in the comments how amazing my new shoes are! 😉